What Falco has to say today …
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
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I have a friend(*1) who has taken to using the word ‘Corluka’ (as in the Tottenham right back) as a form of greeting whenever he’s drunk(*4). It is most perplexing and, even for an idiot, almost entirely without precedent(*5). Sometimes, indeed, the level of my perplexitude completely circumvents my remember-about-human-laws circuit and I threaten to kill him, sometimes with a rock, sometimes with my fists.
This is my way of saying ‘Hello’.
Here – is the news.
The band is now four but hey, perhaps you knew that. Here are the people who are in it -
Me is, well, this guy.
Jack is as Jack does.
Jimmy Watkins is a Libra(*6), 27, and enjoys playing Daley Thompsons Decathlon(*7), only in REAL LIFE. He also plays guitar and ‘sings’ in the rock band ‘Strange News for Another Star’ who I really liked until I found out that they were named after a Blur song(*8). The band also features everyones favourite rehearsal room owner/ misquoted modern sage Mark Foley, who plays bass from a specially erected podium on stage. No joke. No. Joke. Jimmy is ‘short’ for James. SHORT.
Julia Ruzicka is an Australian (new star sign(*9)), 21ish, and when she’s not playing bass guitar she enjoys looking at and talking about bass guitars. Some of you may know her from the band Million Dead, or, latterly, Who Owns Death TV? (question mark not authors own). This winter (summer if you’re Australian) she gets to play her home town, Melbourne, which is pretty exciting if you’re her(*11) or anyone connected to her, like say, this band.
Steven Hodson, as some of you may have noticed with your eyes, played bass for us this summer. He was fantastic(*12) but is now back playing in two other bands, one of whom, Oceansize, is on tour through Europe EVEN AS I WRITE THIS. Sorry, really wanted to capitalise that clause. Aside from being a great bassplayer, Steven is the third funniest man in rock and roll. Who is first and second, you may ask? Well, you may ask.
Kelson is now studying and playing bass in ‘Truckers of Husk’ which also features Hywel Evans, once of this parish. Incidentally, anybody who claims that the band will not be the same now that ‘kelso’ has left is disqualified from any and all retrospectively enhanced nostalgia on the basis of being a halfwit.
Bob Champion died of being in a film in 1986. Kids everywhere remember his incredible will to win(*13).
The following shows are FACTS. Less FACTUAL shows are being talked about as we speak/write/read. I will only list the factual shows.
I am Aslan.
9th December – Cardiff (UK), Clwb Ifor Bach
14th December – Freiburg, Cafe Atlantik, GENERIQ festival
15th December – Montbeliard Le Palot (FRA), GENERIQ Festival
31st December – Phillip Island (AUS), Pyramid Festival
2nd January – Melbourne (AUS), Corner Hotel
3rd January – Brisbane (AUS), The Zoo
5th January – Sydney (AUS), Annandale
There are many, many new songs. I will tell you about them when I can be arsed.
Which will be soon.
(*1) acquaintance (*2)
(*2) guy I hate (*3)
(*3) yes, it’s a strong word.
(*4) which is anytime after 5pm.
(*5) my fourth favourite word, due in part to excessive misuse.
(*6) I have no idea what one of these is, but it sounds like it has something to do with swimming.
(*7) best computer game ever in the history of 1984.
(*8) I like them again now but don’t tell Jimmy.
(*9) I’m just emailing Russel Grant(*10) now.
(*10) fat astrologer who stole Leo Sayers hair in the late 70s.
(*11) which I’m pretty sure you’re not, unless you are.
(*12) scientific term.
(*13) and his forehead.